park closed for 2009 season

This is a sad day for amusement park fans everywhere. Due to the failing local economy and less-than-expected attendance, Charmland USA has been forced to close for the 2009 season. Please respect the new No Trespassing signs.

Despite an unprecedented 2008 capital improvement package that included the addition of 450 charming California Sycamore trees, visitor levels sunk to new lows; an estimated 27 people entered through our gates, though in-park surveys noted that 97% were simply lost. A mid-season promotion, "Year of a Dozen Dreams", gave 12 lucky winners a free Charmland Season Pass -- however, even this yielded zero new visits. With an annual operating budget of $4.2 million and a revenue of merely $8.99, management had little choice but to turn potential 2009 guests away.

"Our guests know what they want, and what they want are trees... just not ours," said Grace Lenss-Hunter, General Manager of Charmland USA. "Every year we conduct surveys to guage what new attractions, shows, and other offerings will best satisfy our visitors and keep them coming back for more. In 2008 we thought we hit a home run, but damn was I wrong."

Unlike many amusement parks that focus on behemoth steel thrill rides at the expense of their surroundings, Charmland USA believed in taking a more naturalistic approach. "We thought that if we had a quality park, people would come in droves to escape the drudgery of their otherwise miserable lives," added Lenss-Hunter. "We don't have traffic. We don't have loud machinery. I still can't get a cell signal out here. We assumed people would pay a premium for this charm. Or perhaps our prices were still too low. I really have no idea. I only got this job because of Dad."

Nevertheless, one piece of bright news is that for the 11th year in a row, Charmland USA has won the coveted "Most Charming Park" award, as determined by the readers of Amusement Today. Despite new and fierce competition, we'd like to thank our fans who have consistently and unwaveringly voted the same all these years. Kudos you!

Since its early beginnings, generation after generation has traveled to Charmland USA to partake in the park's unmatched atmosphere. Longtime park-goer Tess Hingmin concurs: "When one pictures 'charm', does concrete come to mind? Huge metal structures? Cookie-cutter rides you could probably find anywhere? Never! We all know the real timeless attractions are, in fact, trees. But now we have nothing.

"If only some large, corporate behemoth could come and save us."